Valentine’s Day is all about hearts, flowers, and promises. But beyond the chocolates and candlelight, there’s another kind of romance that truly lasts i.e. financial security. Valentine’s Day also an opportunity to strengthen the foundation of your relationship by having honest conversations about money.
Studies consistently show that financial disagreements are among the top causes of stress in relationships. The good news is couples who plan money together build stronger, calmer relationships. These couples report higher levels of trust, satisfaction, and long-term happiness. So this Valentine’s Day, consider giving your relationship the gift of financial clarity.
Money is one of the most common sources of stress in relationships, not because couples don’t earn enough, but because they don’t talk enough. Financial planning isn’t about control but about clarity, trust, and shared direction. University College of London’s Joe Gladstone, Notre Dame’s Emily Garbinsky and UCLA Anderson’s Cassie Mogilner Holmes found that long-term committed couples who pool all their money into joint bank accounts are happier in their relationship and less likely to break up, compared to couples that keep some or all of their money separate.
The 5 Love Languages of Financial Planning between couples
1. Words of Affirmation: Open Communication About Money
Start by having regular, judgment-free conversations about your financial goals, fears, and dreams. This can be done by setting aside time each month, perhaps over a nice dinner, to discuss your finances openly.
Don’t just talk about “how” you spend money or “what” you plan to do with it. Share the “why“. Discuss your money background, spending philosophy, and future aspirations.
When working with couples, it is common to see both partners carry financial fears. One may worry that their savings are insufficient for retirement, while the other fears their investments are too aggressive. As financial advisers, we help couples understand each other’s perspectives and plan together with confidence.
2. Quality Time: Planning Your Future Together
It is important to work together and create a financial roadmap that includes both short-term desires and long-term dreams. May it be a dream vacation, a new home, or a comfortable retirement together.
You may have already nominated beneficiaries or appointed donees under your LPA. While there is no need to disclose every detail, sharing the reasoning behind these decisions can deepen mutual understanding and alignment.
3. Receiving Gifts: Building Your Emergency Fund
An emergency fund might not seem romantic, but it’s one of the most loving gifts you can give each other. Aim for 12 months of expenses in a readily accessible account. This financial cushion provides peace of mind and protects your relationship from the stress of unexpected expenses.
4. Acts of Service: Sharing Financial Responsibilities
Divide financial tasks based on each person’s strengths and interests, not outdated gender roles. One partner might handle day-to-day budgeting while the other manages investments. The key is ensuring both partners remain informed and involved in major decisions.
5. Physical Touch: Building Tangible Wealth Together
Whether it’s a joint investment portfolio, a savings account for your dream home, or contributions to your retirement funds, create something tangible you can both see growing, . Watching your wealth grow together strengthens your bond and shared sense of achievement.
Your Next Steps: Make This Valentine’s Day Count
- Schedule your first “Love and Money” date this Valentine’s week
- Download or create a simple net worth statement together
- List your top three financial goals as a couple
- Discuss one money topic you’ve been avoiding
- Consider professional guidance to accelerate your progress
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